Four Beautiful Letters: BDSM Read online

  Nick laughed, delighted with her. “Insatiable girl. I love that about you.”

  He helped her to stand and then took her into his arms. He placed his hand lightly on the back of her head as he pressed his mouth to hers. Her lips parted and he slipped his tongue past them as he pulled her into a close embrace, loving the feel of skin on skin. His heart actually hurt in his chest, aching with tenderness, while at the same time, his cock, pressed hard against her hip, throbbed with lust.

  When they parted, she stared up at him with shining eyes. “Holy moly,” she said with a breathless laugh. “The boy can kiss, too!”

  With a joyous whoop, he lifted Sophia in his arms and carried her to the recovery couch.

  As he settled her onto it, he said, “We’ll definitely do it again, but you’ve had enough right now. Time for a little aftercare and then I’ll take you up to one of the VIP suites for some champagne and…” he waggled his eyebrows suggestively, making her laugh again.

  As she reclined on the couch sipping sparkling water, he smoothed a healing cream over the worst of her welts. Just as he was finishing, there was a sudden, sharp knock on the door.

  Nick swung his head toward the sound, scowling with annoyance. Who the hell was that?

  “Do we need to get that?” Sophia asked. “It sounds pretty insistent.”

  “Fuck, no,” Nick swore. “My staff knows better than to disturb me. It’s got to be some new member or other who’s confused. We’ll just ignore it and they’ll go away.”

  But the knocking continued, now accompanied by a masculine voice he recognized as Phillip’s, Elizabeth’s second in command. “Excuse me, Mr. Kincaid,” Phillip called through the door. “I’m terribly sorry to disturb you, but there’s an emergency at the other club. Apparently, the place is on fire. A four-alarm fire, sir,” he added in an urgent tone. “Elizabeth felt you needed to be told at once.”

  “A fire,” Nick cried. “Is anyone hurt? How did it start?” He had risen to his feet without realizing it. He glanced back at Sophia, who had lost that dreamy, satiated look.

  She was regarding him with concern. “Pull on your clothes,” she urged. “You have to go. Obviously, you have to go, Nick.”

  “I can’t just leave you,” he began, but she was already up too. She strode purposely toward his clothing and gathered it into a bundle. He glanced helplessly from her to the closed door.

  Of course, she was right. He had to go. His people could be in trouble. Someone might be hurt. He had to get over there and see what was happening. While Sam, the manager at Impulse II, was good, he couldn’t be expected to handle this all on his own.

  “Okay, Phil,” Nick called through the door. “I’m getting dressed. I’ll be right out. Call Samir and make sure he’s out front waiting when I get down there.”

  “Yes, Mr. Kincaid,” Phillip replied, the relief evident in his tone. “Right away, sir.”

  Nick pulled on his underwear and trousers and slipped his arms into his shirt. He allowed Sophia to button it while he zipped his fly, buckled his belt and stuck his feet into his shoes, not bothering with the socks.

  “I’m so sorry, Sophia,” he said, running his hands over his face and up through his hair. “I hate to leave you like this. I had wanted to make this night really special. I—”

  “Don’t be crazy,” she interjected. “You’ve got people and property to see to. I totally understand. If it was my shop on fire, you can bet I’d be out of here in a New York minute.”

  Relief flooded through him at her understanding, though the longing and remorse remained. “You’re really something. You know that?”

  “So, I’ve been told,” Sophia replied with a sassy grin, though something in her face had closed—her eyes no longer directly meeting his. “Now, get the hell out of here. I’ll clean up.”

  He started to protest, to explain staff would take care of that, and that he would call her a cab or she could sleep upstairs, but before he could speak, she said urgently, “We’ll talk later, Nick. This is an emergency. Do what you have to do. Go.”

  She turned away suddenly, but not before he saw the tears fill her eyes, one spilling down her cheek.

  “Sophia,” he cried, moving toward her.

  “No,” she said sharply, her face still averted. “I’m fine. I promise. You need to get the hell out of here. They’re waiting for you.”

  Knowing she was right, and not knowing what else to do, he turned on his heel and went.

  Chapter 10

  Nick stared at the column of numbers. They stared back at him, stark and black against the light of the computer screen, their meaning suddenly indecipherable. It was two in the morning. The whole fire mess had put him seriously behind with his other projects. Not to mention Brian had just given his abrupt notice the day after the fire, leaving stacks of unfinished analysis and paperwork for Nick to juggle, along with everything else. Margery, his very reliable and much over-worked office assistant, had stayed until nearly nine every night since Brian had baled in an effort to help get things back under control. But Nick felt as if he were swimming against the tide—and being pulled slowly out to sea.

  It wasn’t long ago that he would have taken these various setbacks in stride. Nothing got Nick Kincaid down. Give him an obstacle and he’d find a way around, over or through it. He thrived on challenge and adversity. But lately, the game had lost its glitter and all he felt was exhausted.

  Not to mention, he was in the process of letting the best thing—the best person—ever to happen to him slip through his fingers and, very possibly, out of his life for good.

  “What the fuck are you doing, Kincaid?” he said aloud, pushing back from his desk with disgust. Since when had money and power become more important than love?

  But that wasn’t really the question, was it? The real question was, how had he lived his entire life before Sophia doing that very thing, and having no problem with it?

  Though he was presently spending practically every waking hour trying to keep his business ducks all lined up and paddling nicely, his heart wasn’t in it. In fact, it was nowhere nearby, which might explain why he was having so much trouble getting things done.

  That drive—that obsessive, do-anything-for-the-deal drive had been derailed by this amazing woman who had exploded into his life that first day at Desire Island. She had remained front and center in both his heart and mind ever since then, but he’d been too busy to show her the attention and love she deserved.

  He kept drifting into sexy daydreams about Sophia at the most inopportune times. Earlier in the week, he’d actually lost the thread of the conversation during an important conference call with several key players. He had trouble mustering enthusiasm for potential new deals that would have totally energized and absorbed him before he’d met this astonishing woman.

  He hadn’t seen her since the night of the fire, in spite of his best intentions. He simply had too much on his damn plate. Each night, when he finally found the time to call Sophia, she was always gracious, sexy and responsive. Yet, underneath her charm, he sensed she was slipping away from him. He was losing her.

  And for what? Another piece of real estate? Another couple of zeroes on his bank balance?

  Exasperated, he turned off his computer, not even bothering to save what he’d been working on. “This is fucked up, Kincaid,” he said, pushing back from his desk and getting to his feet. “Something’s got to change, and it’s got to be you. And it’s got to be now.”

  All at once, he knew what he had to do. The realization exhilarated him. The solution was so simple. The actual execution would be a little more complicated, but that was why he had lawyers and accountants. Once he’d made the decision, the rest was just details.

  He laughed aloud and actually did a little impromptu jig right there in the office. It was as if he’d just thrown off a ten-ton weight he hadn’t even realized he’d been carrying. He slipped his hand into his pocket, wanting to text Sophia his exciting news.


  But he caught himself. It was the middle of the night. He wouldn’t disturb her. Nor would he tell her what he planned to do. He would just do it. And then he would tell her, face-to-face.

  ~*~

  Friday night, six days since the fire at Nick’s club, Sophia sat in the back office closing out the accounts. Once she was done with that, she’d tackle pricing the new items she’d accepted on consignment.

  She looked up in confusion when the brass bells on the front door tinkled, as she’d closed up the shop an hour earlier.

  “Yoo hoo,” Laura’s familiar voice called out. “You still here, Soph?”

  “Back here,” Sophia replied. “What’re you doing here? Did you forget something?”

  Laura appeared at the doorway. “You.”

  “Huh?”

  “I’ve come to collect you. You’ve been moping around all week. I’m not buying your ‘everything’s fine what are you talking about’ line for another second.”

  When Sophia started to protest that everything was fine, Laura held up a hand.

  “Don’t forget—I’ve known you a long time, and I know when you’re full of shit. So, put away whatever you’re working on. It’s been a billion years since we had a girls’ night out.”

  “What about Ben? An hour ago you couldn’t wait to get home.”

  Laura slapped her forehead. “I know, right? I totally forgot Ben had this bachelor party thing. I’m on my own tonight. I’m assuming, based on the moping, that you are, too?”

  “I have not been moping,” Sophia asserted, though maybe she had been—just a little. “And I’m on my own because that’s what works for me right now, okay?” She could hear the defensiveness in her tone. Forcing a smile, she added, “Really, everything is good. We’re just taking a little breather. Nick has a lot on his plate right now.”

  The fire had damaged a significant portion of the other club before it was contained but, fortunately, no one had been hurt. Still, there was plenty for Nick to deal with, including his partner’s sudden defection, which only piled more on his already full work plate. Mindful of the pressure and stress he had to be feeling, Sophia had done her best to be patient and understanding. But the truth was, she was dying to see him, and if he’d so much as crooked a finger in her direction, she’d have come running.

  “Okay,” Laura said, her tone dubious. “If you say so.” She put her hands on her hips and cocked her head. “So. We going or what? I’m starving. I’m thinking sausage, mushroom, peppers and onions. Oh, and some of those yummy garlic knots Sal makes. And a pitcher of ice-cold beer. You in?”

  Sophia chuckled, aware resistance was futile. Laura had that determined “I’m on a mission” look that brooked no refusal. Not to mention, pizza and a beer sounded pretty darn good at the moment, as she’d worked through lunch.

  “Okay, you’ve sold me.” Sophia pushed back from the desk and picked up the security deposit bag. “We just need to swing by the bank on the way.”

  A half hour later, they were seated at a small table in the tiny neighborhood restaurant, each with a mug of beer on the red-checkered tablecloth between them. “What’s the latest with the fire situation?”

  “Nick’s still dealing with the insurance company. They haven’t yet ruled out arson, even though Nick says it’s pretty clear it was an electrical issue.”

  “So, when do the two of you connect again? Sounds like your last date was awesome, at least while it lasted.”

  Sophia had told Laura about Nick’s private club and had shared a broad overview of their hot scene, though she hadn’t spent too much time on the details, which would freak out her BDSM-lite dabbling friend.

  Sophia shrugged. “No firm plans at the moment. We’ll probably reconnect soon. Maybe this coming weekend.” She shrugged again, feigning nonchalance. “I don’t know.”

  Laura regarded her with a quizzical expression. “You sound kind of lukewarm about seeing him again. Is the bloom already off the rose?”

  Sophia was saved from answering as the waitress arrived, carrying a huge pizza and a basket of garlic knots. The pizza looked fabulous and smelled wonderful. Sophia selected a piece and sprinkled it liberally with freshly grated parmesan and red pepper flakes. She added several buttery garlic knots to her plate and tucked in.

  They ate and drank for a while in companionable silence. Then Laura, who would keep at something like a dog with a bone, said, “Back to Nick. I could have sworn you were falling in love with that guy. But now, I don’t know what’s going on. I just know you seemed down all week, even though you keep denying it.” She placed her hands flat on the table and leaned forward. “Level with me. Tell me what’s really going on in that head of yours. Are things cooling off between you?”

  Sophia took a long pull on her beer as she thought about how to answer. This was Laura, after all—her best friend. She would just lay it out there—her endlessly looping conversation with herself—and see what Laura made of it.

  “Here’s the thing,” she said. “I’m still completely obsessed with the guy. I think about him constantly. I get all shivery remembering our time together.” She hugged herself, her body tingling with the muscle memory of being held down, the latex anchoring her in place, never knowing where the next stroke of the cane might fall. The erotic pain had been perfectly juxtaposed by the relentless intensity of the vibrating toy at her sex. But the experience had been so much more powerful because of their emotional connection. It had added a whole other dimension to their scenes, one she had never experienced with any other Dom.

  “It’s not just the sex,” she said aloud. “Or even his incredibly intuitive knowledge of what I need. We had fun just walking on the beach, or sharing a drink at night by a fire pit. He makes me laugh. He’s funny and kind. He cares about the people who work for him and provides benefits and health insurance to all his employees, even part-time ones. And the way he kisses…”

  Sophia sighed, her fingers fluttering to her lips as she recalled their last, passionate kiss, their naked bodies pressed together. She would have melted to the floor if he hadn’t held her tight in his warm, strong embrace. And then the dashing way he’d scooped her up in his arms as if she weighed nothing, like something straight out of a romance novel.

  Laura laughed, cutting into Sophia’s daydreams. “You should see your face. You’ve got it bad, girlfriend. You can spout all that friends with benefit nonsense till the cows come home, but any idiot can see it’s more than that.”

  Sophia wrapped her arms protectively around her torso, her resolve stiffening. “No. This is the way it has to be. Friends with benefits is the only way to go with a man like Nick. There’s a reason he’s forty years old and still single. He’s married to his career. Everything else—everyone else—comes second by definition.”

  Laura looked skeptical but Sophia barreled on. “As hot, sexy, intense and perfect for me as he is when we’re together, Nick Kincaid is not relationship material. And I have no intention of putting my heart out there to be smashed—not out of cruelty, but out of neglect, however benign and well-intentioned. I’m not some swooning teenager pining by the phone. I’ve got my own life to live. So, yeah—it’s all good. I’ll keep my options open. There are still plenty of Doms in the sea. It’s all for the best. I’m good with this.”

  Laura eyed her for a long moment, doing that disconcerting thing she did where she peered directly into Sophia’s head. “Whatever you say, chief,” she finally said.

  In stage whisper, she added with a sly grin, “Liar, liar, pants on fire.”

  ~*~

  Nick woke energized and excited on Friday morning, despite having had only five hours of sleep. He was still firm in his resolve to make some dramatic changes in his life, and determined to make it happen sooner than later—today if possible.

  He looked at his phone in case Sophia had texted him, but the screen was blank. He opened the message app, but then closed it again.

  He spent the next ten hours straight on the pho
ne and in meetings, only taking a break when Margery forced him to eat a sandwich and get outside for a few minutes of fresh air. Of course, it would take time to actually seal the deal, but he now had the workings of a positive arrangement that would profit everyone involved. More than that, it would set him free.

  He was aware that Sophia closed her shop at six and lived within walking distance of her business. He hadn’t yet been to either her shop or up to her apartment, though he had been outside the building when Samir and he had picked her up.

  It was just a little after seven when Samir dropped him at the curb in front of her building. He hadn’t seen Sophia in six days. He hadn’t told her he was coming. He wanted it to be a surprise—hopefully a good surprise.

  “I’ll text in a while to let you know if I’ll need you again tonight,” he said to Samir as he gathered up the items he’d purchased. He flashed a grin, adding, “If things go well, I won’t need you until tomorrow.”

  He juggled the large shopping bag and flower box into one hand as he punched in the four-digit code Sophia had shared with him that would gain him access into the building. When the buzzer sounded, he shouldered his way into the small, rather shabby lobby, which was deserted.

  He walked to the single elevator and pushed the button. He took a step back and waited, bouncing nervously on the balls of his feet.

  The elevator wasn’t making any noise and there were no lit numbers indicating movement of any kind. That was when he noticed a placard lying on the floor near the elevator door. It had apparently fallen from where it had been taped, and read: Out of Order in bold printed letters. Beneath it, someone had scrawled in ink, Again.

  With a sigh, Nick headed toward the stairwell. He climbed the four flights, gifts in tow. As he neared her floor, his heart picked up its pace, not out of exertion, but excitement. He walked down the narrow hall, past the sound of a baby crying in one apartment, someone playing loud music in another.